April 14, 2008

Just a Mom

This past year has been challenging to me when it comes to motherhood, but not in the way you'd think. Let me explain...

My husband is in ministry, which makes me in ministry, which is great by me. Love it. Especially working with those Aggies. Having kids changed alot (OK, all) of how I can be involved in the ministry and, slowly, I've gotten used to that. But this year, the church's schedule changed to where all the college things are at different times than other church things (read: childcare) so I haven't been able to do much of anything that I am passionate about, except discipleship. It's been difficult for me to be content in that and, to be honest, always having to be home with the kids when Kyle is at work on some nights. I am totally a single mom on Sundays and Wednesdays and that is hard for me to accept as part of the ministry wife role. 

So my role beyond wife this year is one: mom. And being who I am...always wanting to be busy and have a million different things going and having my hands....I find myself saying to myself, "I'm just a mom" while mentally running through a list of all the things I could be doing or I used to do or I will do in the future. 

I know, I know. It's a significant role, the most important, blah blah blah. But when you're changing the second smelly diaper of the day at 7:30 am and saying "use your words" for the 22nd time at 9:30 am and folding the laundry and scrubbing toilets and doing all the mundane things, it's hard to remember that.

Thankfully, the Lord always steps in and reminds me that He sees. That each thing I do in love toward my children, even making another peanut butter and jelly sandwich and wiping a runny nose, He remembers and will reward me for in Heaven. That each little day in its simple routine adds up to alot of significance in three little lives. I'm the only mother they'll have and, besides their daddy, the most important influencer in their lives. Thank you, Lord, for reminding me that you are the Ultimate Servant and if I want to be like you, I must serve too.