May 14, 2011

The Pastor's Wife? Not Me!

I missed Ministry Monday this week, but how about Ministry Thursday? I recently got an email from a ministry wife in response to one of my blog posts on being a pastor's wife. I could relate to what she said and I figured most of you--ministry wife or not--could relate so I asked her if I could share her email. Tomorrow, I'll share my response to her, but today, I'd like YOU to share your responses to her email in the comments section.

P.S. The blog is getting a facelift so if it's acting a little funny, that's why.

I was just reading your blog and I had to contact you. I so appreciate your openness and efforts to give a voice to the "ministry wife". I have to confess though, I just read Kelly Matte's post and I'm choking back tears. All I can think about when I read what kind of ministry wife she is is: that's. not. me. I've never met her in person, but all of her answers to your questions seem just exactly what my idea of a perfect ministry wife should be. I know, I know, I'm sure she's not perfect. I just look at her heart and think, wow, I'm not even in the same ballpark! I'm so far from being a great pastor's wife. Forget [Loving Husband] coming home to a "peaceful haven with banana bread baking"! It's more like crying kids and a frozen meal. Who would want their pastor's wife to look like me?

[Loving Husband] has been looking for a new job now for 2 years and just recently has gotten a lot of advice about considering being a senior pastor. That thought terrifies me. How can I come alongside him in shepherding a congregation, when I feel like I'm just trying to keep myself and our family afloat? What if I hinder his ministry instead of help it? What if I fail miserably, publicly, embarrassingly?

I don't mean to turn this into a long therapy session, but how do you respond when God places a call on your husband's life? I feel like I'm just along for the ride. Surely He can't be calling ME to be a pastor's wife! I'm much more suited to being a staff wife, not THE pastor's wife! I'm too sarcastic. More sassy than sweet. More Martha than Mary. I know that He can accomplish all things, but I just don't ever see myself fitting into a Kelly Matte kind of mold. Help!

Can you relate? How has God spoken to you about these things? What would you share with this ministry wife?