November 9, 2011

Enough

Just as the speaker took her place at the podium, the woman next to me slid her book across the table, offering me a quick peek inside. She said I could have it for free if I would promote it on my blog so, politely, I flipped through the pages, glanced at the back cover, and returned it to the table before turning my attention to the stage. Soon, I became engrossed in the speaker's story, furiously writing down her hard-won wisdom. But to my left, the woman who had passed me her book pulled out her cell phone and began scrolling through her Facebook and Twitter feeds. I casually inched her book back across the table, certain that I would not read it nor promote it because of her.
I did not know this woman and I may very well have completely misread her, but no matter because in that moment, that woman--seemingly so intent on promoting herself, so self-focused-- raised a full-length mirror to my own heart. I was gripped by it, so sure of what I was seeing. She reflected back to me my own dark desires of instant success, popularity, and followers. A Clamorer, dissatisfied, concerned with worldly success more than character, wanting desperately to bypass daily faithfulness and dependence.

In the mirror, I saw wickedness.

I ran, ashamed, considering the core of the matter, the lies that weave their way into my life:

What I'm doing is not enough.
What I have is not enough.
I am not enough.

I am concerned about the state of my heart, that gets so easily caught up in the online frenzy of self-promotion and image-keeping. I am concerned about all of us, that we are pining after and comparing and envying ourselves away. We are clamoring to stake a place in the world, to be noticed or seen or loved or respected, but losing our souls in the process.

But what I'm doing is not enough.
Enough! If we are faithful in what God has given us today, it is enough.

What I have is not enough.
Enough! In this moment, we have everything God intends us to have.

I am not enough.
Enough! We may not be enough for other people, but when God looks at us, He sees Jesus. And He is enough.

It doesn't matter how many people you lead or influence, if you ever see the fulfillment of your dreams, or if you ever measure up to some perfect standard. It matters most--and to the most important people--that you are faithful in the unseen, in the daily things. Those things matter because they add up to a God-filled life.

Today, let us quiet the clamor and the comparisons, the swirling online world, and the self-accusations. Today, let's rest in Enough.