July 25, 2012

How to Be a Church Planting Wife

How to meet people where you're planting:
  • Meet every single one of your neighbors.
  • Hang out at playgrounds with your kids and strike up conversations with other moms.
  • Join a book club or the PTO.
  • Talk to your waiters.
  • Shop at the same places on the same days at the same times.
  • Go where the people of your city congregate with the intent to engage people.
  • Start a neighborhood playgroup.
  • Join a community sports league.
  • Get involved at your child's school.
How to best support your husband during the first year of planting:
  • Think of things to talk about other than the church.
  • Tell him specific ways that you see God using him.
  • Take your frustrations about church planting to the Lord before you take things to your husband.
  • Maintain consistent time in the Word. Depend on the Lord to meet the needs only He can meet.
  • Celebrate small victories.
  • Don't tell him what to do or how to do it.
  • Get involved in the process. Support his calling.
  • Be flexible.
How to figure out your role in all this craziness:
  • Always remember that, no matter what you do for the church, your most important roles are disciple, wife, and mom.
  • Give it time (like years) to definitively narrow down your ministry role.
  • Accept that in church planting you will be a generalist for a long time before becoming a specialist.
  • Know that your role will change with each year and stage of church planting.
  • Ask your husband for feedback on how God often chooses to use you.
  • Be on guard against spiritual attack, specifically discouragement and emotional struggles.
How to maintain your sanity in church planting:
  • Maintain consistent time in the Word.
  • Once you know someone well enough to babysit your kids, do whatever it takes to establish and keep a consistent date night with your husband.
  • Don't be afraid to take time off to catch your breath or get some perspective.
  • Establish relationships in the community. Maintain perspective on why you're doing what you're doing.
  • Make time to do something that interests you.
  • Don't be afraid to pursue counseling or ask for help.
  • If possible, find a mentor.
  • Don't say yes to every ministry opportunity presented to you.
  • Structure your life well.
  • Have open and beneficially honest dialogue with your husband about how you're doing and how his job affects you.
Anything you would add to my lists?
--from the archives